I would think that, once I reach crone-hood, I’ll stop caring about what “other people” think about my appearance. Instead, I’ll demand to be treated the way aging male news anchors are treated: like a font of wisdom, to be paid more and more money for granting society the benefit of their experience, despite their graying, thinning hair. However, I’ve just learned via Lisa Black of WGAL.com’s entertainment desk that, no, even long post-post-post menopause, I’ll need to continue to consider what “they” think of my hair. And if I choose to keep long hair, well, I better look damn good in it or else they’ll all be “laughing behind [my] back.”

Here’s a message from the future long-haired, sexy older woman to those who might judge me for keeping my hair whatever length I want: screw you.